Los Angeles 1996. I arrive home from a hard night of after hours drinking at the at the Sunset Marquis. I am as white as snow (with boiled ham pink accents) & my hair is down to the bottom of my rib cage. At 6 feet tall, I weighed maybe 130 pounds soaking wet.
I take off my clothes and realize I forgot to check my mail for money I badly needed. There weren't security cameras in my building yet, & my Macallan Whisky soaked brain told me "Just jump in the elevator in your underwear. There's no chance you'll see anyone at 4:30AM. It's only 2 floors".
As luck would have it, the elevator doors sprang open and who's standing there?
Me: Fuck! I am so sorry!
Kate Moss: (Eyes squint shut, disgusted, she lets out a barely audible "Ugh".)
In a vain attempt to un-freak her out, I try & make a joke.
Me: "Y'know, the ONE time you go the mailbox in your underwear drunk in the middle of the night, of COURSE Kate Moss is standing there".
Kate: (Looking down at her shoes. Eyes still clenched shut).
Me: Floor?
Kate: (sighs) 4th please. (Turns & faces the wall).
And scene.
No comments:
Post a Comment